Am I Too 'Independent' To Find Mr. Right?

I came across this video on YouTube 'Why Ms. Independent Can't Find Mr. Right' (see video below) and was like 'Wow!'. Although I have never considered myself to be the stereotypical Mrs. Independent who goes around saying I don't need a man, don't want one, and has a problem with a man helping me - I couldn't help but notice that I did have some of the qualities that she outlined in her video. Mainly, the one about being in a rush when I'm in the store. I am definitely a 'get in and get out' kind of person. I'm usually in another world with my mind all over the place so I don't engage in my environment. 

I have been saying that with the online dating that I needed to start initiating more when I see someone that I find interesting. However, like she said in the video, I am over online dating (and I just started a week ago) Lol! I would so much rather meet someone organically as I don't know if my personality really comes through on my profile (or maybe I need a professional to write it for me).

I like the technique that she goes over in this video though. She calls it the 'You Choose He Chases'. I am definitely going to use that. I usually don't have a problem flirting if I am really interested, but this approach that she has is a great way to break the ice and see if there is chemistry between you and the guy. I need to get me some cards though :)

Books you may be interested in*:

Never Chase Men Again: 38 Dating Secrets To Get The Guy, Keep Him Interested, And Prevent Dead-End Relationships

F*CK Him! - Nice Girls Always Finish Single - "A guide for sassy women who want to get back in control of their love life" (The Truth about his weird ... of commitment and sudden loss of interest)

 10 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men: Understand His Mind And Capture His Heart

*Books are affiliate links but this post is not sponsored, all opinions are my own.

5 Second Rule Challenge Getting Up Earlier

So I've been listening to Mel Robbin's The 5 Second Rule because there are certain things in my life that I know that I need to do, but I have been hesitating and I wanted to break myself out of that bad habit. The book talks about how to break yourself out of the vicious cycle of having an idea, knowing that you should act on that idea, not doing anything about it and then beating yourself up for your inaction. Something that Mel says in the book is that when you hesitate you are actively working against your dreams.

I am part-way through the book and at the end of the section that I am on she talks about the challenge of setting your alarm 30 minutes earlier and breaking the habit of hitting the snooze. I of course already knew that waking up earlier makes you more productive and allows you to get more done and have read it in several books about goal setting. I even wrote about it here on this blog. But the usual happened: you get inspired to do something while you are reading a book, listening to a podcast, watching a YouTube video, etc then the moment passes.

One of the points that she makes in the book that I really like is this- she basically says that motivation is garbage. You are not going to always feel like doing the things that you need to do. World class athletes don't train only when they feel like it. We are beings that go off of feeling and we do the things that we feel like doing. We go to the gym when we feel like it, we eat what we feel like eating, etc. The 5 second rule is a way to force yourself to do the things that you need to do whether you feel like it or not. The wake up challenge is a start to that process because if you can conquer your day then you are well on your way to achieving your goals.

So I set my alarm for 6:15 this morning, which on a Sunday morning was not something I was exactly excited about. I got up, got dressed and went and got me a cup of coffee ready to plan my day. One thing I realized is that although I didn't initially want to get up, I am refreshed at the thought of starting my day with more time. My goal is by the end of the week to start my day at 5:30.

Here is a video of Mel talking about how she finally got herself to stop hitting the snooze button. 

Book Recommendations:

What the Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast: And Two Other Short Guides to Achieving More at Work and at Home - I've read this book and it's a really great read.

Design Your Day: Be More Productive, Set Better Goals, and Live Life On Purpose - Great reviews

The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play - Sounds interesting and has great reviews. 

**Book links are affiliate links but all opinions are my own

Let's Be Honest Dating After 40 Totally Sucks Lol

Yeah, yeah, yeah I know I should have a better attitude, but I definitely feel like I'm riding a bike that's on fire lol. Hey, I'm just being honest. I think that's why it has taken me a while to get back into the game. The thought of dating just puts me in a not so great state of mind.

Don't get me wrong, I definitely like being in a relationship, but the whole finding someone to be in a relationship part is what I am exactly excited about. You would think that dating would get easier as you get older. Afterall, you are in a place (or should be) where you know what you want. You should be done with the figuring it out part by a certain stage in your life, but yet far too many people don't have the ability to articulate what type of relationship they want or if they want one at all.

But now that I have gotten my rant out of the way, I know that I have to change my mindset or I shouldn't even bother with dating. I definitely believe in the power that your thinking (positive or otherwise) has on the outcome of your life. So I am vowing from this point forward to do whatever I have to do to change my mindset about this very necessary step that I am taking in this point that of my life.

I read in this article online that one way to stay positive is to think of each date as a learning experience. That works well for me since I believe that every experience that you have in life puts you closer to where you need to be in your life. So with that in mind, I'm going to put on my happy face, maybe listen to 'Happy' by Pharrell and get to it! :)




Create your own user feedback survey
*Affiliate link